Recent Conversation
Recently, as part of a two week effort in a local church, the topic of spiritual growth was discussed in the framework of an unlimited data.
In a place where love is to abound, whenever people feel that they can’t be themselves and seek answers, this creates a lot of tension and friction. The group I was called to speak to expressed lots of anxiety about discussing their spiritual growth with part of the church. They felt that they had to be perfect before they could be accepted in the greater church family.
While this may not make sense to the part of the parish that feels already accepted, it can’t be swept to the side and ignored. Pointing any finger to insist the other party is wrong interrupts the desire for communication to thrive. Fortunately, during the course of the event, many opened up and shared their feelings and both parties started to understand each other better.
A few lessons
Whenever there is limits put on sharing ideas, a pause is helpful to regroup. That church felt there was a block in communication with the two generations at odds with each other. Leadership did all they could to break the barriers. That is one sign of a good family working together to overcome issues so everyone can benefit.
Both parties wanted to feel at ease as a family. We all want similar things. Finding the way to get there is not always easy, but those who don’t give up on the family, will find a way to make it work… even if it means asking for outside help… as in involving this blog’s writer to help out.
Matters of the heart, the mind, the soul all require patience to process and develop. This group learned to try new approaches of communication and to trust the investment they had already made. Each family has to trust that they’ve got a strong enough bond, then work to build on that to have a better tomorrow
Spiritual implications
Your well-being depends in part on your ability to express what’s on your mind and have the listener understand and adjust accordingly. That’s the whole negotiation dance of communication.
Example: I feel that when you side-eye me, you’re judging me. – says one person. No, I was not aware I was side-eyeing you. What can I do to change that perception? – says the other person
This opens up the lines of communication that probably were strained before that chat. Once they clear that up, they both can find a way to work together and not misunderstand each other. The resulting peace of mind can often be the difference between a great relationship and a bad one. The ripple effect will impact many more who aren’t directly involved too.
How?
Think about the mood you get into when your loved one hurts you. Your co-workers feel it. Your fellow classmates feel it. Everyone will feel some impact from your hurt.
We’re all spiritual beings. We feel things. Energy travels and transfers. Having a safe process to communicate with the person who has hurt you… finding a resolution… moving on… helps minimize the negative impacts we might otherwise have had on our surroundings.
This brings into play the whole notion of forgiveness, repentance, progress, and inclusiveness. Topics which will eventually get their own blog posts.
